Yom Kippur: Is this who we want to live with, forever?
Tonight is Yom Kippur. As Jews, we do not eat or drink for 25 hours. We take a serious look at ourselves and judge our behavior this past year.
Last week my son tried to get out of an uncomfortable situation by lying. My wife and I have worked hard to teach him the value of honesty. We’ve told him we don’t lie. We’ve told him that we never lie to him (and we have not), we have told him lying leads to more dishonesty, but none of those approaches have worked.
This time I told him something different that my Rabbi had told me years earlier.
I said, what are the consequences of lying?
He said, you don’t trust me?
I said, there’s a worse consequence. One that is absolutely untenable for you.
He said, I lose my Legos?
Even worse than losing Legos. I said, each time you lie, you create a person who is okay with dishonestly. That is the person you will have to live with your entire life. You must live with yourself your entire life. I will be around for part of your life, friends will come and go, you’ll move homes, but you will always be with yourself.
The consequence of dishonestly is having to live with a dishonest person, forever.
This year on Yom Kippur I plan to look at my behavior and ask myself, is this the person I want to live with for the rest of my life? How can I do better?
No matter our faith, we should ask ourselves, do we want to be the kind of person who supports our colleagues, judges others negatively, or gives someone the benefit of the doubt? Do we want to be someone who dedicates time to engaging with our loved ones? Mentoring others?
Because the cost of leaving that nasty comment on someone’s post, speaking negatively about someone else, or bending the rules is we must live with that type of person, forever.
Each small decision builds the person I am.
Whether you are Jewish, another faith, or of no faith, we can all benefit from a Yom Kippur where we ask ourselves, am I crafting the person I want to live with forever?
I wish everyone a meaningful Yom Kippur full of self-evaluation and a wonderful new year
.